Dear Magdi,
I had an unpleasant interaction with someone and it bothers me. Should I try to heal or harmonize such a past event, even if i don’t se that person again?
Is it good to heal the past?
How can this be done?
~~~
The past is memory and, usually, it has a me-character in it, as well. What needs to heal is not the event, but the me-character. It is not the behavior of the me-character that needs maintenance; rather you need to inquire and contemplate the nature of that me; you need to realize your true nature.
You see, as long as there is a separate me on board, there is unhappiness. When the me is believed to be real, then you are in the business of fixing it. What if you were attempting to fix a dream character?
Instead of trying to heal and harmonize a past event, you can contemplate the unpleasantness of the interaction. Why was it unpleasant? What mechanisms were at play?
I bet that there must have been a sense of separation. A me and a him; a me and a her; a me and an other. A sense of duality.
When we perceive ourselves to be a separate self, we perceive others as separate and we perceive an external world. We perceive external threats as a result of the belief that I am a mortal body mind. That is where/how the misery starts and it plays itself out in our life: in relationships, in situations, in events, in our night dreams…
Contemplate in all honesty and sincerity: What evidence do I have that I am a mortal body mind? After all, am I not the witness of the world, body mind events? Am I not the aware presence, the screen of consciousness that is unstained by whatever images appear?
Once it is revealed to you that the imagined separate self is a dream, you will experience a glimpse into your true undivided nature and this peek will take you to the end of all conflicts and unpleasantness.
Rather than navigating outwardly, navigate inwardly.
Photo by Sasa Gyoker