When you drop the critical mind, when you do not maintain the judgemental mind and remain as you are, the wholeness of being/awareness may be available to you.
There is no separation in gods eyes.
You need to uproot the old tendencies of differentiation and nurture the love 💗 that unites us all.
The love that we are. The love that is.
Do not be concerned about the past. Past deeds are current memories attempting to pull you into regret, attempting to maintain you in the sense of separation.
That is the unhappy illusion which you don’t really care about. Follow your bliss and not transient states or experiences.